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5:08
Principal Skinner's Vietnam Flashbacks/Dark Moments (Reupload)
Beer Baron
·
May 9, 2026
Open on YouTube
Transcript
0:00
of course I'm not the only one who
0:02
benefited from last week's big payoff
0:03
our state schools got their share too
0:05
here lottery officials present
0:07
Springfield Elementary with a brand new
0:09
eraser one eraser oh I'm used to my
0:13
government betraying me I was in Nam aye
0:15
sir for 3 other principals try to unload
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0:17
problem cases that way lord knows I do
0:20
I'm a good student Principal Skinner
0:23
yes sir and they told me I'd get a big
0:24
parade when I got back from Nam instead
0:26
they spat on me I can still feel it's
0:29
searing so let's just see what the
0:32
permanent record house design Charlie
0:33
hmm no detention fairly good attendance
0:36
record now I see you beat that
0:38
bedwetting problem in the second grade
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0:41
don't worry they'll forget just like
0:44
they forgot about me and a tiger cage
0:47
for 18 agonizing months every night I
0:51
wake up screaming well let's meet your
0:54
classmates and I haven't seen such
1:01
unfettered early Burley since the fall
1:04
of Saigon well William another school
1:07
year going by listen to your mother
1:09
ELISA
1:09
I owe everything I have to my mother's
1:12
watchful eye and Swift and oh there's
1:18
mother now
1:19
watching me with that mother well they
1:24
have a right to be here
1:24
it's school business I mother that
1:28
sailor suit doesn't fit anymore
1:30
I think we should go
1:32
[Music]
1:35
Principal Skinner the happiest place on
1:38
earth
1:38
is a registered Disneyland copyright
1:41
well gentlemen it's just a small school
1:43
carnival and it's heading for a great
1:45
big lawsuit you made a big mistake
1:47
Skinner well so did you
1:50
you got an ex-green beret mad copyright
2:05
expired where is nur - for 600 100 I
2:11
wore this for two years in a Vietcong
2:13
internment centre never thought I'd see
2:14
the old girl again still fits small
2:19
where it is is really really used
2:23
everyone misses Principal Skinner some
2:26
student possibly Bart Simpson has been
2:28
circulating candy hearts featuring crude
2:30
off-color sentiments well let me tell
2:32
you something
2:33
valentine's Day is no joke
2:41
[Music]
2:44
Sunday yurchikhin Valentine huh yeah
2:51
Donny Donny cool I broke his brain so we
3:01
meet again Mad Magazine
3:04
the year was 1968 we were on recon in a
3:07
steaming Mekong Delta and overheated
3:10
private removed his flak jacket
3:11
revealing a t-shirt with an iron on
3:13
sporting the mad slogan up with
3:15
miniskirts we all had a good laugh even
3:18
though I didn't quite understand it but
3:19
our momentary lapse of concentration
3:20
allowed Charlie to get the drop on us I
3:23
spent the next three years in a POWs
3:26
camp forced to subsist on a thin stoom
3:28
and of fish vegetables prawns coconut
3:31
milk in four kinds of rice it came close
3:35
to madness trying to find it here in the
3:36
States but they just can't get the
3:38
spices race my punishment oh that's my
3:44
old unit for Vietnam I was there
3:46
sergeant
3:46
they were my loyal troops that photo was
3:49
taken shortly before I was shot in the
3:50
back which was very strange because it
3:52
was during a Bob Hope show I was trying
3:54
to get Joey Heatherton to put on some
3:56
pants for God's sake I've been hoping I
3:58
could find something that would be named
3:59
after me and you've never found anything
4:02
once but by the time I got to a phone my
4:05
discovery had already been reported by
4:07
Principal Kohoutek I got back at him
4:11
though even that little boy it is anyway
4:17
back in man like a demand respect
4:22
Sarge let's make a break for it while
4:24
the guards your party with Jane Fonda
4:25
nope too dangerous we're all gonna sit
4:28
tight and reminisce about candy bars oh
4:30
well one time I'm eating a candy bar at
4:33
the beach and a girl starts taking off
4:35
her bathing suit get back to the candy
4:36
bar the hell with this I'm getting out
4:38
of here no you fool
4:46
that elephant ate my entire platoon this
4:50
is the worst thing I've ever done even
4:52
worse than what I did in Nam
4:56
[Music]
5:00
you're gonna get your parade down my
5:03
esophagus
— end of transcript —
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