WEBVTT

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of course I'm not the only one who

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benefited from last week's big payoff

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our state schools got their share too

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here lottery officials present

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Springfield Elementary with a brand new

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eraser one eraser oh I'm used to my

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government betraying me I was in Nam aye

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sir for 3 other principals try to unload

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problem cases that way lord knows I do

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I'm a good student Principal Skinner

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yes sir and they told me I'd get a big

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parade when I got back from Nam instead

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they spat on me I can still feel it's

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searing so let's just see what the

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permanent record house design Charlie

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hmm no detention fairly good attendance

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record now I see you beat that

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bedwetting problem in the second grade

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don't worry they'll forget just like

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they forgot about me and a tiger cage

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for 18 agonizing months every night I

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wake up screaming well let's meet your

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classmates and I haven't seen such

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unfettered early Burley since the fall

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of Saigon well William another school

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year going by listen to your mother

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ELISA

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I owe everything I have to my mother's

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watchful eye and Swift and oh there's

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mother now

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watching me with that mother well they

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have a right to be here

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it's school business I mother that

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sailor suit doesn't fit anymore

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I think we should go

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[Music]

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Principal Skinner the happiest place on

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earth

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is a registered Disneyland copyright

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well gentlemen it's just a small school

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carnival and it's heading for a great

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big lawsuit you made a big mistake

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Skinner well so did you

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you got an ex-green beret mad copyright

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expired where is nur - for 600 100 I

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wore this for two years in a Vietcong

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internment centre never thought I'd see

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the old girl again still fits small

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where it is is really really used

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everyone misses Principal Skinner some

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student possibly Bart Simpson has been

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circulating candy hearts featuring crude

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off-color sentiments well let me tell

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you something

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valentine's Day is no joke

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[Music]

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Sunday yurchikhin Valentine huh yeah

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Donny Donny cool I broke his brain so we

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meet again Mad Magazine

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the year was 1968 we were on recon in a

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steaming Mekong Delta and overheated

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private removed his flak jacket

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revealing a t-shirt with an iron on

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sporting the mad slogan up with

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miniskirts we all had a good laugh even

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though I didn't quite understand it but

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our momentary lapse of concentration

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allowed Charlie to get the drop on us I

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spent the next three years in a POWs

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camp forced to subsist on a thin stoom

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and of fish vegetables prawns coconut

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milk in four kinds of rice it came close

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to madness trying to find it here in the

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States but they just can't get the

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spices race my punishment oh that's my

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old unit for Vietnam I was there

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sergeant

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they were my loyal troops that photo was

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taken shortly before I was shot in the

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back which was very strange because it

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was during a Bob Hope show I was trying

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to get Joey Heatherton to put on some

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pants for God's sake I've been hoping I

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could find something that would be named

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after me and you've never found anything

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once but by the time I got to a phone my

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discovery had already been reported by

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Principal Kohoutek I got back at him

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though even that little boy it is anyway

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back in man like a demand respect

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Sarge let's make a break for it while

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the guards your party with Jane Fonda

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nope too dangerous we're all gonna sit

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tight and reminisce about candy bars oh

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well one time I'm eating a candy bar at

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the beach and a girl starts taking off

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her bathing suit get back to the candy

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bar the hell with this I'm getting out

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of here no you fool

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that elephant ate my entire platoon this

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is the worst thing I've ever done even

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worse than what I did in Nam

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[Music]

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you're gonna get your parade down my

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esophagus