hey Peter you can't drink that outside
you you can end up in jail and not the
good jail like on Cinemax the man jail
go back and pay the bill Peter you uh
don't want to break the law I can do
whatever I want watch this oh now you're
just being crazy hey that's against the
law you're coming with me can't touch me
tension delegates decision of the United
Nations is hereby convened man shucks
hey podium guy hey I got a problem here
excuse me some of us are here to learn
no one's talking to you Albania he's
dead a problem back there
you bet your funny accent there's a
problem I'm stuck up here in the
nosebleeds I am president of Victoria I
want a better seat
oh of course how could we not have
recognized the great nation of petoria
have a seat up front well that's more
like it
and hey would you also like a special
satellite that can scratch her ass with
a laser beam from space hey have those
hey how you doing hey you mind if I yeah
they don't respect you what do you mean
listen to me I used to be the
laughingstock around here until my
country invaded Kuwait now I have a seat
in the third row look the only way to
get any respect around here is to find
something you want and just dig it wait
a second if everybody respects you how
come you still eating here by yourself I
don't shower oh that's what that is take
what I want
morning Peter what are you doing in my
pool this is the newest province of
Pretoria I call it Joe hi Oh what
you can't just come over here and annex
my pool oh yeah
well according to paragraph seven
sentence three word eight of the Geneva
Convention the so tough luck Swanson so
as you can see patria has invaded US
soil what are our options well a
military strike against such a small
nation could cause an international
backlash true but this kind of behavior
can't be tolerated
agreed I suggest we start with political
sanctions very good gentlemen
[Music]
well I guess the world to show me a
little more respect now dad I tried to
go to school but this guy won't let me
oh yeah him in what army
the US Army how did you cut army
the scene outside the u.s. petorian
border as the Sun rises on day one of
Operation Desert clam good morning I'm
Diane Simmons we now go to Tom Tucker
live at the site of the u.s. blockade
Tom diane i'm here at the petorian front
where the US has cut off electricity
water and gas to the tiny four-bedroom
republic the situation is very tense and
extremely dangerous and now sports over
here honey I'm chopping carrots for a
salad here he was this headlamp yeah
where's the kids upstairs doing their
homework i candlelight damn pig dog
Americans messing with my family like
this you know it's just it's just you
know Peter I'm up here Oh sweetie maybe
you should go over to Joe's and return
his paw huh we're a real country and we
deserve all the rights and privileges
that everyone else gets but we have to
think about the welfare of our children
Stewie is that you look Lois my mind I'm
not giving up an inch of petorian soil
it's not a sign of weakness to
compromise I just think you should Pete
uh stop staring at my chest oh yeah
sorry Lois
and we're back with our roundtable
discussion on the Praetorian crisis you
were making a point John yes what the
United States is doing to petoria right
now is criminal
nonsense forces the only thing a
desperate like Peter Griffin understands
oh it's oh it's ridiculous clearly I'm
he's a factory worker not a despot
you're missing the point our blockade is
turning Pretoria into a third-world
country okay
can anybody tell me what the square root
of a hypotenuse is when Chris is that
amount no yes it is
would you like to read it for the rest
of the class no just read it lardo I
think mrs. Griffin's hot go to your room
damn you Rupert keep these little some
insects away from me or you'll end up
like mr. giraffe hi I'm Susan Sarandon a
lot of you know me as Tim Robbins mother
but I'm actually his girlfriend and this
is Stewie
the tooth for less than the ticket price
of one of my movies about capital
punishment or Neil feminism you can make
sure that Stewie never goes hungry again
yes I'm from the look of those sweater
cows so can you
good morning subjects what's for
breakfast
nothing you idiot we don't have any food
Peter this has gotten way out of hand
look at what for a toast to our own baby
has to use newspapers for diapers no no
this is fine
one second I'm just about finished with
Family Circus
who did that Jeffy not me
thank God I haven't seen everyone this
miserable since that time we were
tortured I'm sorry will you just
whipping me in there just did I just get
bit by a mosquito hey Lois if you happen
to see the dungeon master can you can
you tell me grandmother was just trying
to work me over it's time to call this
whole thing off nobody's on our side are
you nuts look at all these telegrams
nice going Libya
you know man North Korea great job Iraq
Iraq Lois you know what I'm gonna fight
a few of these fellas over for a party
[Music]
Lois I told you we had allies hey you
made it
I didn't know what to bring so I made
coleslaw it's made of people
just kidding hey is mom out here yet
yeah he's over there with Saddam and
then Jerry guessed that her name was
Mulva that show is so funny it really
reminds me of me and my friends you know
the way we just hang out before I kill
them for worshipping the wrong God yeah
and I love that Kramer guy he comes in
the room like this you know Marco Marco
Oh
fish out of water yeah yeah Manuel
Manuel do you want it can you ask him if
he wants cheese Fidel no running around
the pool I say I think Achmed what what
is it thing you people do when you when
you're about to assassinate an infidel
ah you mean this
[Applause]
[Music]
[Applause]
what do you think you're going Amerika
I've had enough you can keep this filthy
mess you call a country come on kids
this is treason
Oh for god sake Peter make an example of
her nothing says obey me like a bloody
head or a fencepost
let's go we're crossing the border
goodbye president Griffin well Brian at
least you're loyal enough to stay with
me
yeah I've stuck by you through worse I
guess it's you and me against the world
buddy
as you may presently yourself fully be
aware of my grammar sucks but more
importantly we're about to commence
operation bomb the crap out of your
house the guy who thinks up the names is
on vacation the answer your question
something like that a guy who Ames was
in the John there is what's coming right
at you please a Peter it's over why
don't you sit down with the mayor and
negotiate some kind of treaty negotiate
Peter Griffin doesn't know the meaning
of a word negotiate thank you all for
coming we invited Jesse Jackson to open
our negotiations with a prayer
unfortunately he couldn't make it so in
his place we have la Toya Jackson Thanks
um rub-a-dub-dub thanks for the grub yay
God how very inappropriate thank you now
mr. Griffin would you like to begin okay
after much thought in consideration I
have decided to make a concession at
2:00 very good Peter
first I will return Joe's pool oh you
got that right in exchange I demand
access to it on alternate weekends
no accept it I also demand to remain my
own independent nation absolutely not
well how about you just give me your pen
you mean this cheap a little pen we have
millions of back at the office yeah no
oh man so after all this I end up with
nothing
how about this every night when you get
home from work I'll scratch your back
with
for cover like you like loris
Oh would you call me big Rudy when you
do it now and that's the story of
Pattaya a little nation that 200 years
ago seceded and repatriated in less than
a week any questions yeah I don't get it
so like can the family understand the
baby or or what what's the deal with
that
[Music]