WEBVTT 00:00:02.560 --> 00:00:06.798 Hey boys. You having a midnight snack? 00:00:05.200 --> 00:00:10.879 Mhm. I'm just going to grab something 00:00:06.799 --> 00:00:12.559 too and go back to bed alone again. 00:00:10.880 --> 00:00:14.240 Night. 00:00:12.558 --> 00:00:16.480 You know, Lois has gotten kind of fat 00:00:14.240 --> 00:00:20.000 since you guys stopped having sex. Might 00:00:16.480 --> 00:00:21.278 be time to uh, you know, have some sex. 00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.920 You know, at first I didn't want to do 00:00:21.278 --> 00:00:26.079 it cuz of a vasectomy, but now it's just 00:00:23.920 --> 00:00:28.240 I mean, look at her. She's got elbow 00:00:26.079 --> 00:00:29.678 cleavage. You know that that little 00:00:28.239 --> 00:00:31.839 wrinkle that fat people get on their 00:00:29.678 --> 00:00:33.039 elbows that looks like a schwah. I mean, 00:00:31.839 --> 00:00:35.200 you wouldn't have sex with her, would 00:00:33.039 --> 00:00:36.719 you? Oh, yeah. I would. Really? Oh, 00:00:35.200 --> 00:00:38.559 yeah. Oh, yeah. I would do everything to 00:00:36.719 --> 00:00:40.800 her. I don't care what she looks like. I 00:00:38.558 --> 00:00:43.799 would wreck that chick. Well, you are a 00:00:40.799 --> 00:00:43.799 trooper. 00:00:44.399 --> 00:00:49.359 Sorry. Fat wife coming through. Sorry. 00:00:46.640 --> 00:00:52.520 Sorry. Excuse me, fat wife. Oh, hold on 00:00:49.359 --> 00:00:52.519 a sec. 00:00:53.119 --> 00:00:57.359 All right, bring her through. Peta, stop 00:00:55.119 --> 00:00:59.358 it. For God's sakes, you're embarrassing 00:00:57.359 --> 00:01:00.878 me. Not as embarrassed as I was when I 00:00:59.359 --> 00:01:03.359 got that job entertaining prison 00:01:00.878 --> 00:01:05.280 inmates. Do it again, Griffin. Oh, come 00:01:03.359 --> 00:01:08.240 on. I just did it like five times. Do 00:01:05.280 --> 00:01:10.159 it. My milkshake brings all the boys to 00:01:08.239 --> 00:01:12.478 the yard and they're like, "It's better 00:01:10.159 --> 00:01:15.479 than yours." Damn right it's better than 00:01:12.478 --> 00:01:17.679 yours. I can teach you, but I have to 00:01:15.478 --> 00:01:19.200 charge. Look, honey, with all due 00:01:17.680 --> 00:01:21.759 respect, you've gained some weight 00:01:19.200 --> 00:01:23.840 recently. It's 5 lb at the most. It's 00:01:21.759 --> 00:01:25.759 not a big deal. It's a slippery slope, 00:01:23.840 --> 00:01:27.280 Lois. You start with 5 lbs and then one 00:01:25.759 --> 00:01:29.439 day, boom, you wake up and you're on the 00:01:27.280 --> 00:01:31.359 practice with 16 rings in your ear. 00:01:29.438 --> 00:01:33.919 You're one to talk. Look how fat you 00:01:31.359 --> 00:01:36.000 are. Lois, men aren't fat. Only fat 00:01:33.920 --> 00:01:37.519 women are fat. Now, if you'll excuse me, 00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 I have to go warn the chef that you've 00:01:37.519 --> 00:01:42.798 arrived. 00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.319 He wants fat. I'll show him fat. The 00:01:42.799 --> 00:01:48.720 only reason I'm eating anyway is because 00:01:44.319 --> 00:01:50.478 of him. He won't touch me. 00:01:48.719 --> 00:01:54.399 Do you think I'm fat? Only if you think 00:01:50.478 --> 00:01:56.799 I'm a serial killer. Nothing. 00:01:54.399 --> 00:01:59.840 This Friday on TNT, the world premiere 00:01:56.799 --> 00:02:02.159 of Morgan Freeman in The Narrator. Ever 00:01:59.840 --> 00:02:04.960 since I was a little boy, people have 00:02:02.159 --> 00:02:07.439 enjoyed the sound of my voice. And I 00:02:04.959 --> 00:02:10.079 figured you either get busy talking or 00:02:07.438 --> 00:02:12.639 you get busy dying. The work is really 00:02:10.080 --> 00:02:14.800 quite easy. Why, even right now, I'm 00:02:12.639 --> 00:02:17.519 just sitting in a chair, sipping some 00:02:14.800 --> 00:02:19.520 tea, and reading from a script. The wall 00:02:17.520 --> 00:02:22.360 is covered with something that resembles 00:02:19.520 --> 00:02:26.480 egg crates, except they're soft and 00:02:22.360 --> 00:02:28.400 spongy. Like a Twinkie. Like a Twinkie. 00:02:26.479 --> 00:02:30.959 Oh, hey, Hogzilla. You happen to see my 00:02:28.400 --> 00:02:32.800 hot wife Lois around? No, I haven't. 00:02:30.959 --> 00:02:34.878 Maybe she's out looking for a man who 00:02:32.800 --> 00:02:36.319 can satisfy her. Hey, hey, hey, hey, 00:02:34.878 --> 00:02:37.759 hey, hey, hey, do me a favor. When you 00:02:36.318 --> 00:02:39.439 go to sleep, aim your butt the other 00:02:37.759 --> 00:02:40.560 way. Last night, for God's sake, you 00:02:39.439 --> 00:02:41.919 farted. I felt like somebody was 00:02:40.560 --> 00:02:44.479 sticking me with a cigarette lighter 00:02:41.919 --> 00:02:48.000 from the car. You're fat. Shut up and go 00:02:44.479 --> 00:02:50.959 to sleep. Ow! Ow! Lois, you weigh a ton. 00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:56.840 Get off me. I'm trying. Try harder. Ow! 00:02:50.959 --> 00:02:56.840 Peter, just stop for one second and I'll 00:02:58.479 --> 00:03:02.479 Peter, are we having sex? Uh, let's 00:03:00.639 --> 00:03:07.158 check. Uh, just lift up that fold right 00:03:02.479 --> 00:03:07.158 there. Uh, yep. 00:03:08.239 --> 00:03:13.840 Lois, last night was amazing. It was, 00:03:11.199 --> 00:03:15.439 wasn't it? Fat sex is the hottest sex 00:03:13.840 --> 00:03:17.120 we've ever had. There were so many 00:03:15.439 --> 00:03:19.280 boobs. I don't know whose boobs I was 00:03:17.120 --> 00:03:21.680 grabbing. Your boobs are my boobs. I 00:03:19.280 --> 00:03:23.199 know. It was amazing. Much better than 00:03:21.680 --> 00:03:27.360 that night you pretended your penis was 00:03:23.199 --> 00:03:29.919 Danny Iello. Oh, that is so interesting. 00:03:27.360 --> 00:03:32.560 Danny Iello, you've got the best Spike 00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:35.518 Lee stories. What's that? You want to 00:03:32.560 --> 00:03:37.360 meet my wife? Peta, stop it. Lois, just 00:03:35.519 --> 00:03:40.480 say hello. You're embarrassing me in 00:03:37.360 --> 00:03:43.680 front of Danny Iello. Now come here, my 00:03:40.479 --> 00:03:45.359 fat concubine. Hey, I'm not even hungry. 00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:48.319 Hey, I want you bigger. I want you 00:03:45.360 --> 00:03:51.920 fatter. It will please me. Giggity 00:03:48.318 --> 00:03:51.919 giggity giggity goo.