[00:02] Hey boys. You having a midnight snack?
[00:05] Mhm. I'm just going to grab something
[00:06] too and go back to bed alone again.
[00:10] Night.
[00:12] You know, Lois has gotten kind of fat
[00:14] since you guys stopped having sex. Might
[00:16] be time to uh, you know, have some sex.
[00:20] You know, at first I didn't want to do
[00:21] it cuz of a vasectomy, but now it's just
[00:23] I mean, look at her. She's got elbow
[00:26] cleavage. You know that that little
[00:28] wrinkle that fat people get on their
[00:29] elbows that looks like a schwah. I mean,
[00:31] you wouldn't have sex with her, would
[00:33] you? Oh, yeah. I would. Really? Oh,
[00:35] yeah. Oh, yeah. I would do everything to
[00:36] her. I don't care what she looks like. I
[00:38] would wreck that chick. Well, you are a
[00:40] trooper.
[00:44] Sorry. Fat wife coming through. Sorry.
[00:46] Sorry. Excuse me, fat wife. Oh, hold on
[00:49] a sec.
[00:53] All right, bring her through. Peta, stop
[00:55] it. For God's sakes, you're embarrassing
[00:57] me. Not as embarrassed as I was when I
[00:59] got that job entertaining prison
[01:00] inmates. Do it again, Griffin. Oh, come
[01:03] on. I just did it like five times. Do
[01:05] it. My milkshake brings all the boys to
[01:08] the yard and they're like, "It's better
[01:10] than yours." Damn right it's better than
[01:12] yours. I can teach you, but I have to
[01:15] charge. Look, honey, with all due
[01:17] respect, you've gained some weight
[01:19] recently. It's 5 lb at the most. It's
[01:21] not a big deal. It's a slippery slope,
[01:23] Lois. You start with 5 lbs and then one
[01:25] day, boom, you wake up and you're on the
[01:27] practice with 16 rings in your ear.
[01:29] You're one to talk. Look how fat you
[01:31] are. Lois, men aren't fat. Only fat
[01:33] women are fat. Now, if you'll excuse me,
[01:36] I have to go warn the chef that you've
[01:37] arrived.
[01:40] He wants fat. I'll show him fat. The
[01:42] only reason I'm eating anyway is because
[01:44] of him. He won't touch me.
[01:48] Do you think I'm fat? Only if you think
[01:50] I'm a serial killer. Nothing.
[01:54] This Friday on TNT, the world premiere
[01:56] of Morgan Freeman in The Narrator. Ever
[01:59] since I was a little boy, people have
[02:02] enjoyed the sound of my voice. And I
[02:04] figured you either get busy talking or
[02:07] you get busy dying. The work is really
[02:10] quite easy. Why, even right now, I'm
[02:12] just sitting in a chair, sipping some
[02:14] tea, and reading from a script. The wall
[02:17] is covered with something that resembles
[02:19] egg crates, except they're soft and
[02:22] spongy. Like a Twinkie. Like a Twinkie.
[02:26] Oh, hey, Hogzilla. You happen to see my
[02:28] hot wife Lois around? No, I haven't.
[02:30] Maybe she's out looking for a man who
[02:32] can satisfy her. Hey, hey, hey, hey,
[02:34] hey, hey, hey, do me a favor. When you
[02:36] go to sleep, aim your butt the other
[02:37] way. Last night, for God's sake, you
[02:39] farted. I felt like somebody was
[02:40] sticking me with a cigarette lighter
[02:41] from the car. You're fat. Shut up and go
[02:44] to sleep. Ow! Ow! Lois, you weigh a ton.
[02:48] Get off me. I'm trying. Try harder. Ow!
[02:50] Peter, just stop for one second and I'll
[02:58] Peter, are we having sex? Uh, let's
[03:00] check. Uh, just lift up that fold right
[03:02] there. Uh, yep.
[03:08] Lois, last night was amazing. It was,
[03:11] wasn't it? Fat sex is the hottest sex
[03:13] we've ever had. There were so many
[03:15] boobs. I don't know whose boobs I was
[03:17] grabbing. Your boobs are my boobs. I
[03:19] know. It was amazing. Much better than
[03:21] that night you pretended your penis was
[03:23] Danny Iello. Oh, that is so interesting.
[03:27] Danny Iello, you've got the best Spike
[03:29] Lee stories. What's that? You want to
[03:32] meet my wife? Peta, stop it. Lois, just
[03:35] say hello. You're embarrassing me in
[03:37] front of Danny Iello. Now come here, my
[03:40] fat concubine. Hey, I'm not even hungry.
[03:43] Hey, I want you bigger. I want you
[03:45] fatter. It will please me. Giggity
[03:48] giggity giggity goo.