1 00:00:02,560 --> 00:00:06,798 Hey boys. You having a midnight snack? 2 00:00:05,200 --> 00:00:10,879 Mhm. I'm just going to grab something 3 00:00:06,799 --> 00:00:12,559 too and go back to bed alone again. 4 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:14,240 Night. 5 00:00:12,558 --> 00:00:16,480 You know, Lois has gotten kind of fat 6 00:00:14,240 --> 00:00:20,000 since you guys stopped having sex. Might 7 00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:21,278 be time to uh, you know, have some sex. 8 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:23,920 You know, at first I didn't want to do 9 00:00:21,278 --> 00:00:26,079 it cuz of a vasectomy, but now it's just 10 00:00:23,920 --> 00:00:28,240 I mean, look at her. She's got elbow 11 00:00:26,079 --> 00:00:29,678 cleavage. You know that that little 12 00:00:28,239 --> 00:00:31,839 wrinkle that fat people get on their 13 00:00:29,678 --> 00:00:33,039 elbows that looks like a schwah. I mean, 14 00:00:31,839 --> 00:00:35,200 you wouldn't have sex with her, would 15 00:00:33,039 --> 00:00:36,719 you? Oh, yeah. I would. Really? Oh, 16 00:00:35,200 --> 00:00:38,559 yeah. Oh, yeah. I would do everything to 17 00:00:36,719 --> 00:00:40,800 her. I don't care what she looks like. I 18 00:00:38,558 --> 00:00:43,799 would wreck that chick. Well, you are a 19 00:00:40,799 --> 00:00:43,799 trooper. 20 00:00:44,399 --> 00:00:49,359 Sorry. Fat wife coming through. Sorry. 21 00:00:46,640 --> 00:00:52,520 Sorry. Excuse me, fat wife. Oh, hold on 22 00:00:49,359 --> 00:00:52,519 a sec. 23 00:00:53,119 --> 00:00:57,359 All right, bring her through. Peta, stop 24 00:00:55,119 --> 00:00:59,358 it. For God's sakes, you're embarrassing 25 00:00:57,359 --> 00:01:00,878 me. Not as embarrassed as I was when I 26 00:00:59,359 --> 00:01:03,359 got that job entertaining prison 27 00:01:00,878 --> 00:01:05,280 inmates. Do it again, Griffin. Oh, come 28 00:01:03,359 --> 00:01:08,240 on. I just did it like five times. Do 29 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:10,159 it. My milkshake brings all the boys to 30 00:01:08,239 --> 00:01:12,478 the yard and they're like, "It's better 31 00:01:10,159 --> 00:01:15,479 than yours." Damn right it's better than 32 00:01:12,478 --> 00:01:17,679 yours. I can teach you, but I have to 33 00:01:15,478 --> 00:01:19,200 charge. Look, honey, with all due 34 00:01:17,680 --> 00:01:21,759 respect, you've gained some weight 35 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:23,840 recently. It's 5 lb at the most. It's 36 00:01:21,759 --> 00:01:25,759 not a big deal. It's a slippery slope, 37 00:01:23,840 --> 00:01:27,280 Lois. You start with 5 lbs and then one 38 00:01:25,759 --> 00:01:29,439 day, boom, you wake up and you're on the 39 00:01:27,280 --> 00:01:31,359 practice with 16 rings in your ear. 40 00:01:29,438 --> 00:01:33,919 You're one to talk. Look how fat you 41 00:01:31,359 --> 00:01:36,000 are. Lois, men aren't fat. Only fat 42 00:01:33,920 --> 00:01:37,519 women are fat. Now, if you'll excuse me, 43 00:01:36,000 --> 00:01:40,000 I have to go warn the chef that you've 44 00:01:37,519 --> 00:01:42,798 arrived. 45 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:44,319 He wants fat. I'll show him fat. The 46 00:01:42,799 --> 00:01:48,720 only reason I'm eating anyway is because 47 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:50,478 of him. He won't touch me. 48 00:01:48,719 --> 00:01:54,399 Do you think I'm fat? Only if you think 49 00:01:50,478 --> 00:01:56,799 I'm a serial killer. Nothing. 50 00:01:54,399 --> 00:01:59,840 This Friday on TNT, the world premiere 51 00:01:56,799 --> 00:02:02,159 of Morgan Freeman in The Narrator. Ever 52 00:01:59,840 --> 00:02:04,960 since I was a little boy, people have 53 00:02:02,159 --> 00:02:07,439 enjoyed the sound of my voice. And I 54 00:02:04,959 --> 00:02:10,079 figured you either get busy talking or 55 00:02:07,438 --> 00:02:12,639 you get busy dying. The work is really 56 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:14,800 quite easy. Why, even right now, I'm 57 00:02:12,639 --> 00:02:17,519 just sitting in a chair, sipping some 58 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:19,520 tea, and reading from a script. The wall 59 00:02:17,520 --> 00:02:22,360 is covered with something that resembles 60 00:02:19,520 --> 00:02:26,480 egg crates, except they're soft and 61 00:02:22,360 --> 00:02:28,400 spongy. Like a Twinkie. Like a Twinkie. 62 00:02:26,479 --> 00:02:30,959 Oh, hey, Hogzilla. You happen to see my 63 00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:32,800 hot wife Lois around? No, I haven't. 64 00:02:30,959 --> 00:02:34,878 Maybe she's out looking for a man who 65 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:36,319 can satisfy her. Hey, hey, hey, hey, 66 00:02:34,878 --> 00:02:37,759 hey, hey, hey, do me a favor. When you 67 00:02:36,318 --> 00:02:39,439 go to sleep, aim your butt the other 68 00:02:37,759 --> 00:02:40,560 way. Last night, for God's sake, you 69 00:02:39,439 --> 00:02:41,919 farted. I felt like somebody was 70 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:44,479 sticking me with a cigarette lighter 71 00:02:41,919 --> 00:02:48,000 from the car. You're fat. Shut up and go 72 00:02:44,479 --> 00:02:50,959 to sleep. Ow! Ow! Lois, you weigh a ton. 73 00:02:48,000 --> 00:02:56,840 Get off me. I'm trying. Try harder. Ow! 74 00:02:50,959 --> 00:02:56,840 Peter, just stop for one second and I'll 75 00:02:58,479 --> 00:03:02,479 Peter, are we having sex? Uh, let's 76 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:07,158 check. Uh, just lift up that fold right 77 00:03:02,479 --> 00:03:07,158 there. Uh, yep. 78 00:03:08,239 --> 00:03:13,840 Lois, last night was amazing. It was, 79 00:03:11,199 --> 00:03:15,439 wasn't it? Fat sex is the hottest sex 80 00:03:13,840 --> 00:03:17,120 we've ever had. There were so many 81 00:03:15,439 --> 00:03:19,280 boobs. I don't know whose boobs I was 82 00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:21,680 grabbing. Your boobs are my boobs. I 83 00:03:19,280 --> 00:03:23,199 know. It was amazing. Much better than 84 00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:27,360 that night you pretended your penis was 85 00:03:23,199 --> 00:03:29,919 Danny Iello. Oh, that is so interesting. 86 00:03:27,360 --> 00:03:32,560 Danny Iello, you've got the best Spike 87 00:03:29,919 --> 00:03:35,518 Lee stories. What's that? You want to 88 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:37,360 meet my wife? Peta, stop it. Lois, just 89 00:03:35,519 --> 00:03:40,480 say hello. You're embarrassing me in 90 00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:43,680 front of Danny Iello. Now come here, my 91 00:03:40,479 --> 00:03:45,359 fat concubine. Hey, I'm not even hungry. 92 00:03:43,680 --> 00:03:48,319 Hey, I want you bigger. I want you 93 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:51,920 fatter. It will please me. Giggity 94 00:03:48,318 --> 00:03:51,919 giggity giggity goo.